When I was in high school and became a self proclaimed Wiccan, I was weird. I was always one of those kids that didn't belong to any certain group. I had my friends, I had my boyfriend, and I could flit easily between different groups of people because my identity was fluid. Only later, much later, would I learn that because of my empathic abilities I was arranging myself to fit whatever my surroundings were, which was why I adapted to different groups of my peers so easily. But the witch thing? That was me and only me. If there were other witches in my graduating class of 2005, I wasn't aware of them. Wicca set me apart, gave me some self identity, and made me feel "edgy". I liked being different. I liked the air of mystery.
I jumped in with both feet, reading Living Wicca by Scott Cunningham and feeling like i had come home to a place where things made sense. I can say right now, I definitely did not read enough. And although it may have been familiar to my soul - I had NO idea what I was doing. Anyone who knows anything about any form of the Craft can tell you how dangerous that actually is. This is possibly what my "issue" is with the fad of witchcraft now. With all of the 'experts' that are proclaiming their paths on WitchTok or the "baby witches" who are soaking up all of that energy. Weren't these supposed witches hexing the moon a few weeks ago? Like, are you kidding me? The Internet can be a wonderful place, full of so much information. But it can also be a spiral of misinformation, fanatics, and people claiming to be something they are not.
I read Scott Cunningham's book and thought, "Well, let's invoke some Goddesses, shall we?". This was before the days of WitchTok, Instagram pages and the like. I went home, set up my little candle, turned off all my lights and called out into the ethos for "the Goddess" to come and find me. My windows were shut, my fan was not active, and I was not in a grounded and center state of mind by any means, because I didn't even know what that meant - and I was seventeen, which is the opposite of grounded and centered by definition. But Wicca - that's all love and light, right? That's green magic and weather and beautiful silvery Goddesses that bring down the moon for you. Nothing could possibly go wrong. Silly. Little. Girl. I still, to this day, could not tell you what came into my room that night. But my candle flame went insane, dancing and jumping everywhere. I felt a change in the air, the hair all over my body stood on end - much like it is doing now recalling. I could feel a breeze. And then my candle went out. And ladies and gents - can I please tell you I FREAKED. I'm just sitting there saying, come to me - come to me - with no precautions, no cleansing, no grounding... Basically just a neon flashing sign to anything and everything that coulda been nearby. This is why kids get in trouble, playing with things they don't understand. Maybe I am a natural. Maybe the Goddess, in one of her forms, was like "Hey girl I SEE YOU" and came running... But the odds of that are very very slim. I jumped up, turned on my light, and I did not invoke anything - ever - for many, many years.
I did, however, study. I studied my lil witch butt off. I studied Wicca, Druids, Shamanism, a multitude of different forms and varieties of witchcraft, and even Satanism (it truly gets the worst rep). I studied from 17 to about 30. I practiced little manifestations. I learned. And I learned some more. And I combined everything I was learning into a big mushy soup bowl of magick knowledge. And from 17 to 27, I spent a decade identifying as Wiccan. Celebrating the Sabbats, talking to a God & Goddess (mostly the Goddess), worshiping the moon. But, I am also a student of psychology. And I have lived and met some wonderful, and horrible, experiences and people. And I have felt - and do feel - ALOT of energy. Whether people want me to or not - whether I want to or not. And I have come to respect and desire balance, in all aspects. Wicca, does not accept balance. It speaks about it a lot, but it is not balance. Dark and Light - "Good" and "Evil". This desire for balance and view of the world in shades of gray rather than black or white is something that is very strong in me. At around 27, I started practicing a bit more actively and veering away from the title of Wiccan. By 30, something big changed in me. I am on a very personal journey right now - and also tapping into an intuitive and natural power I had not been aware of. And I still have SO much to learn. But all of life, any of our lives, are a journey of self discovery. So yes - when the "witch fad" hit a couple years ago, it was very hard to suppress the heavy eye rolls. But other people's lanes and choices are not my business. A lesson everyone needs to learn, especially in the days of the almighty internet. So, does the occasional video or post have my rolling my eyes, still? Yes - can't lie about that. But, seeing witchcraft as something accepted in the community? That I am down with... And seeing so many young women (and men) rise up and start taking their power back? Start using their voices. Respecting their boundaries. Embracing all of themselves... Well, that, I find revolutionary. You do not need to sit down and shut up ... ever. If the energy doesn't match, find some different energy.
Whether you can feel it or not, there is a shift going on right now. There is a big battle for the energy on our planet. I am learning the most effective and authentic ways to stay in mine, to cultivate mine in order to give something good back to the Universe in my time here and bring me close to the Source.
If you have been searching for your own guidance... there is no time like the present, literally. The veil between worlds is currently thinning... and will continue to do so up until Halloween/Samhain/All Saints Day/ etc. The energies right now continue to grow more and more potent. Open to them and I promise you will see some amazing things over the next few weeks. Look for synchronicities, listen for your ancestors whispers... it's all there, you just have to open to it. Break down some comfort barriers. Go howl at the moon. Start a Coven, or don't, be your own Coven. I personally had a group of four (five) people together the other evening to celebrate the Autumn Equinox and for the first time could feel some heavy, powerful energy in the room between us. So, Coven it is, lol. But whatever your path - just make sure that it is one of your own choosing... not one you jump on board because of the latest fad. However, I can say that I love some of those witchtok videos, I can't lie. Found a dude on there who had me makin' this sick fire in my stone bowl with some sea salt and hand sanitizer...
I should also state, as a "Welcome" note. I have had a lot of people message, tag, text, etc to ask me questions... May I please be the first to tell you - I do not know everything. But I will happily share what I do know and support you in your journey... Because the days of hiding in the shadows and running from fires are over. We embrace our shadows now - and we hide from nobody. We don't have to fear fires of those who may fear the power, or sense their loss of control over us... We are the fires. Grab your broomsticks... This is gonna be a wild ride.
